Look, I understand about coincidences. Common interests. I’ve even accused someone of stealing my life before. But that was the life I was going to live, if all had gone well. Not the one I’m actually living.
But Kate over at Views and Mews by Coffee Kat has seriously hijacked my real life. And frankly, I don’t know why she would want it. But OK. Let’s just review all we allegedly have in common, or at least what she claims:
- Irreverent, funny blogs. Annoying as hell because hers is frequently funnier than mine. Annoying. As. Hell.
- Youngest of three children, only girl
- Breast cancer survivor
- Lost our dads when we were little
- Husbands are named Dan
- More than mildly obsessed with cats (I mean, her blog is edited by her opinionated cats)
- Her cats are having dental problems suspiciously close to when my cat had dental problems
- Kate claims she once had red hair (but guys, I have always had red hair)
- Kate is addicted to Starbucks mocha lattes; I too have indulged in Starbucks mocha lattes
- Eerily similar careers where we were one of a few intelligent life forms asked to manage a sea of incompetence and bad attitudes
That’s a lot, right? Now Kate would also have you believe we have lots of differences too. She would point out her love of summer, including gardening, and fish and frog mating rituals, which are seriously not my thing. Honestly she seems just a tad too interested in the mating rituals of aquatic life, but I don’t like to judge.
She goes to a gym or something. Like every day. She is not helplessly addicted to sweets (but seriously, don’t mess with her mocha lattes).
Still. I think that’s all just a ruse. I think she rustled up a few obvious contrasts just to make it seem like she didn’t hijack my life. But this isn’t my first rodeo people. OK, actually, I’ve never been to a rodeo because, hello, I’m me, but what do you want to bet Kate either has or hasn’t been to a rodeo? If she has, it’s because she’s trying to make herself seem different. If she hasn’t, it’s because she hijacked my life. Either way, it’s very telling indeed.
So WTF Kate?
Ha! The elephant in the blogosphere was finally addressed. I want you guys to do an episode of “Wife Swap.” You would at least get the husband’s name right.
Hmmm. Maybe Kate and I should do a blog swap. I could make stuff up about her pond animals….and her cats.
Too funny! The similarities are pretty amazing.
I know, Kate is so nervy!
Hmm…maybe you hijacked Kate’s life…
That’s just not possible Pam. It must be the other way around.
There is that program or app or something where you find your “identical twin” who you aren’t related to. Now that was an awkward sentence! My point being if there are people out there who look just like you, why can’t there be people out there who have parallel lives to you? Sounds like a basis for a good science fiction story to me. As soon as I finish my werewolf one I’ll get right to it.
I’ve been to several rodeos, I sincerely doubt it would be your thing. Too much dust and heat, though the cowboys are decorative. County fair food is really interesting, absolutely amazing what you can eat on a stick.
I hope no poor soul is living my parallel life.
Dan tells me all the time that I could be living a completely different life in a parallel universe. But what’s the point if I don’t know about it in this universe? He has a smart ass answer for that too…
You might favor mocha lattes in an alternate reality, but in this one it’s mocha frappuccinos, or cappuccinos in cold weather… Totally different.
Dan honey we’ve spoken before about you commenting on my blog. Strictly prohibited.
I don’t do rodeos either. Have you checked? Perhaps you were adopted. There is an age difference so we couldn’t possibly be twins unless you refused to come out of the chute on time. On second thought, that sounds like you. Always wanting to make the entrance. Sheesh! Let’s go for a mocha latte. You’re buying.
I’ve checked. As much as my family would like to deny me, they can’t. We all look too much alike. So we’re left with the obvious conclusion that you are in hijack mode. Clearly. And thank you for that!