As Far As I Remember, Those Were The Good Old Days

I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. I love it because I can reconnect with people and see what’s happening in their lives. And I hate it because I can reconnect with people and see what’s happening in their lives. OK, mostly love, and we’ll leave it at that.

I had stopped going on FB for a while because it was just too much to keep up with. My musings post automatically, but I rarely logged on and checked the newsfeed. Recently I jumped back on and immediately got sucked right back in.

Checking on the status of family members first, I noted that my niece had called my  nephew a “douche” on his wall. What a proud and heartwarming moment for me as an Aunt. Ah, to revel in those two absolutely delightful young adults. As I noted, when I see a post like that I know that something is right in this crazy world.

Then I noticed that my college roommate had a picture from circa 1982 where my hair was simultaneously chemically straightened, and forcefully “feathered”, neither to very good effect. It was scary. May both Farrah Fawcett and my old hair “style” RIP.


But that was just the beginning. Suddenly there were more pictures posted, and then I posted a few of my own…and then everyone started reminiscing. That’s when one of my friends suggested we all get a beach house together next year and rekindle the good old days. I am as nostalgic as the next person, but a group house? I noted that I would be 50 next year, and I’m not sure I should be staying in a house with people I’m not related to. Well, that did it. Bring on the jokes and insults—I get it. We all got older at the same rate.

The thing is, some of those guys started out with a modicum of maturity and good sense. I did not. I was a moron. So my maturity level seems accelerated when in fact it’s just that I  started behind the eight ball.

I’m trying to picture how this group house concept will unfold. I’m guessing after we get all hopped up on Snackwell cookies and decaf coffee, the conversation might center on the state of our retirement funds and whether or not the older Boomers are in fact going to suck up all the social security before we have a chance to get at it. Mortgage rates, the stock market, the cost of living. Sure, I assiduously avoided the general angst and expense associated with parenthood, but my cats can go through fuzzy mice and scratching pads at an alarming rate. Have you even priced Friskies Buffet lately?

And inevitably I will need to look at pictures of other people’s happy, healthy, well-adjusted children and wonder how people who 30 years ago spent most of their time drinking Malt Duck in a 7-11 parking lot have successfully reproduced and raised lovely little humans. My rule of thumb is that for every two pictures of their kid I look at, they will have to look at one adorable cat photo. Awww. There’s Jack sleeping on the sofa, curled up with Chrissy. Precious, am I right?

I know at least a couple of us long ago gave up drinking, so I would likely stock the fridge with almond milk and diet Dr. Pepper. I have to leave my pill box out on the counter or I forget to take my meds—and believe me, everyone wants me on my meds. I can only assume that like me, my friends are also now taking meds for a variety of ailments. So, will all our pill boxes be lined up on the counter? It’s a whole new take on the drug problem we heard so much about back in those days. At least we can turn the music up as loud as we like because if the cops come to the door the only things we’ll be holding are cholesterol and blood pressure meds. Let’s hope no one panics and flushes everything when they see the fuzz. My co-pay went up this year.

Look, no matter what happens, I was holding that Lipitor for a friend.

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14 Responses to As Far As I Remember, Those Were The Good Old Days

  1. Lisa Bowie "the sensible classmate" says:

    Jill – I swear I laughed ’till I cried reading this! And squealed with joy when I saw you were “in”! I might have to add “Depends” to this list now because I’ll be laughing so damn hard I may need them. I still have Cosmic Wimpout! Lesley will probably want to get a rousing game of quarters going but instead of taking shots of malt liquor you and I can do shots of M&M’s. Malt liquor tends to make me break out in handcuffs so I had to give it up ; )

    • Jill Foer Hirsch says:

      The sensible classmate? You flatter yourself…

      I’m 100% in on the M&M shots! Then we can laugh at Lesley at take photos of her which we can use for blackmail. Being sober has a lot of upside!

  2. M Rubenstein says:

    I am way older than you and your friends. I also gave up dorm living long ago, back in the days of en loco parentis, in fact. Suggest you and your buds go to the same hotel somewhere, acquire separate sleeping accommodations and then bounce for one of those meeting spaces that is furnished like a great room, not a conference room, complete with whatever room service-type amenities for which you choose to cough up the money. If most of you 50-somethings are honest, you will not want to pull an all-nighter reminiscing. And if you stay up much past 2 a.m., unless you are accustomed to living with peri, actual or postmenopausal insomnia, you will feel not-so-great the following morning. Better yet, plan an extended lunch in a private room in a decent restaurant. If that goes well, then you can do the hotel thing. I’m not funny like my cousin-by-marriage Jill, but I try to be realistic. You may have bonded in your youth, but each of you may have changed a bit since then and be able to tolerate one another in small doses only.

  3. Julie Hicks says:

    This is a good one Jill. I was one of the friends with a “modicum of maturity and good sense”, right?

  4. Vanessa says:

    Very funny…and so true! We would all need our own cabin. That might work.

    • Jill Foer Hirsch says:

      Cabin? Umm, I don’t stay in cabins, unless that’s a new feature at The Four Seasons! I’m not, umm, “rustic”. 🙂

  5. mimijk says:

    “The Big Chill’ minus the dead body and Kevin Kline. I don’t know, my hunch is that everyone would be lining up their pills, insisting on the one bedroom with its own bathroom and a pharmacy’s worth of Gas-X, Tums and Tylenol. But the music would be great and the company, though a little older, would be great!

    • Jill Foer Hirsch says:

      I agree-especially about the no dead body. And no “loaning” out hubby, a la Glenn Close. 🙂

  6. Lesley Washington says:

    Then obviously we will need another fridge for those of us that still drink Malt Liquor in the 7-11 parking lot 🙂 Actually, we were not stupid enough to drink in the parking lot we went into the woods after dark with boys and beer and we all survived (because after all that is pretty stupid too!) You will have to do a blog after the “reunion” and change our names to protect the innocent….you know you are going to have a great time! Cosmic wimpout, reading glasses, tie dies, antacids, and loud music because we are now deaf..

    • Jill Foer Hirsch says:

      OMG we did go in the woods with boys and beer. It’s amazing any of us survived. Anyway, you had me at Cosmic Wimpout. I’m in.

  7. Jill Foer Hirsch says:

    In general, I won’t share a bathroom with my own husband, so I’m sure as hell not sharing with anyone else. Remember the days when you would just crash at someone’s house? No worries, if there was a sofa or a good piece of floor, and maybe a blanket, it was all good. Oh, the days before we had to worry about pulling our backs out.

  8. So funny! We talk about getting together with some couple friends and the same things go through my mind. We all need our own bathrooms because…well….when you get older you just don’t have the control you had as a youngster. What happens if the cholesterol meds get mixed up. We all use the same week-long pill boxes. Perhaps if I can find a purple one. The good news is that we can’t smell or see so good so a lot will go unnoticed. Go for it and have a great time!

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