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Remember that your mother taught you not to steal…
Or were you raised by wolves? © Jill Foer Hirsch and Universal Musings, 2012-2016. Yes, this material is copyrighted. That’s what © means. Aren’t you clever? This incredibly humorous and delightful material is my original work. And while I’m flattered that you want to copy some or all of the material, unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Jill Foer Hirsch and 'universalmusings' with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. Or else.
Tag Archives: Judaism
The Spirit Of Christmas?
There are three things you can count on in this world—taxes, death and holiday sweaters. I understand taxes and the inevitability of death, but I am slack-jawed when it comes to holiday sweaters. They typically look like a small child’s … Continue reading
Will Argue For Fun
When Dan and I moved into our new home in 1997, we struck up a conversation about where we would put our Christmas tree, if we had one, which we do not. I felt strongly that our fictional tree should … Continue reading
The Year Jane Ruined Christmas
We’ve all seen the Grinch Who Stole Christmas and A Christmas Carol, but I know a real family who will never have Christmas again. It all started with a crying 6 year old, and not to point fingers, but she … Continue reading
Happy Hanukkah To All, And To All A Good Night
I know many of you are getting excited for Christmas, but as you are probably aware my people are 3 days in to the 8 day Festival of Lights, Hanukkah. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Hanukkah, rest … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Childhood, Family, Irreverent, Judaism, Television
Comments Off on Happy Hanukkah To All, And To All A Good Night
Everything Sounds Better In Yiddish
There are some Yiddish words you’ll need to know to follow this blog: Schmy = browse, meander; Schlep = lug around; Goyim = non-Jews (goyisha = behavior or habits of the goyim); Shiksa = goyisha girlfriend; Fapitzed = all dolled … Continue reading
The Story Of My People: Fitness
I know it’s hard to believe, but I actually used to eat right and exercise. For a while it seemed good for me and all, but I’ve yet to meet a fried food or piece of milk chocolate I didn’t … Continue reading
How I Spent My Summer Vacation
From what you know about me, do I seem like someone who should have ever been sent to camp? I hate the great outdoors, and I’m not exactly athletic. Nonetheless, when I was 12 or so, I found myself packing … Continue reading
Picture Perfect
I hate to pick on CJ and Lisa, but the thing is, they have the instant, perfect for any occasion gift for our parents; pictures of the kids. Artsy black and whites, the kids dressed up in matching sailor outfits, … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Animals, Childhood, Family, Humor, Imagination, Judaism, Social
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The Stars Were Bright On That Baltimore Night
Once everyone was happily settled in with crab soup and crab fluffs and crab cakes and crabs, do you think everyone could just relax and eat? Not until everyone at the table had offered to share everything they were eating with … Continue reading
An Evening in Baltimore
We made history tonight! The very first table was just fine! Yes, we did the seat assignment shuffle as anticipated, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could have been. We mostly did what my family does best, eat … Continue reading