WTF: Maybe Next Time I’ll Check The Label

Don’t say I didn’t warn you. When I resumed blogging in January I cautioned that I might post incessantly about my health woes. And I do not plan to disappoint!

So recently I explained how I am titrating on a new drug, Uptravi. And I had also told you that my meds come from a specialty pharmacy, sent via overnight delivery. Both of these pieces of information will be important to understanding this week’s debacle. The good news is that I am finally at the full dose of 1600 mcg, twice a day. The bad news is that the side effects have been difficult. Nausea, sure, that’s a given, but for whatever reason this medication also causes muscle pain. Like from the bottom of my feet to the top of my head. [Note: this is a good time to take a moment and feel sorry for me. Possibly send me a gift. Just a suggestion.] But the doctor thinks this is a temporary thing and if I power through it my body will adjust to the full dosage. So in addition to the anti-nausea med, she prescribed pain killers, upping the ante on my ratio of meds that control the side effects of the PH meds to the actual PH meds.

Because I’ve been titrating, the pharmacy had sent me different denominations of Uptravi; most recently some 800 mcg tablets and some 200 mcg tablets so I could add more each week. The 800 mcg tablets looked to me like purple and the 200 tablets are yellow. When I reordered, I let them know I was up to the full dosage and didn’t need the 200 mcg tablets anymore. Let me be completely clear that I was completely unclear about the fact that they also make little purple (or another color that looks like purple) tablets that are 1600 mcgs. Clueless.

I guess green and brown both look like purple to me.

I guess green and brown both look like purple to me.

I bet you see where we’re headed with this. My order of Uptravi came in the nick of time Tuesday, as I needed that bottle to take my evening dose. So I popped two of those suckers before ever looking at the bottle other than to note it was the right drug. I mean, it looked exactly like what I’d been taking. This kicked off a chain of events. First I started to feel funny (not to be confused with humorous, which is how I frequently feel, even if others disagree). Then I looked at the bottle more carefully and saw the 1600. At that point I let loose a whole string of curse words. Really good ones.

I tracked down the on-call pharmacist. He put me on hold for several minutes before telling me there was nothing they could do. He warned me I would probably have a rough night, with more pronounced side effects than normal. Great. Did I mention I was already taking two drugs to counteract the side effects of a regular dose?

Rough night indeed. Followed by a rough day and another rough night. But today, like the phoenix rising from the ashes, I lifted my head off my pillow before saying “F*ck I still feel like sh*t.” Progress people, remember I said this with my head not even touching the pillow. And I managed to lumber downstairs like a bear coming out of hibernation, in the sense that I was clumsy, hungry and grumpy.

Is it safe to come out yet?

Is it safe to come out yet?

I had a little breakfast, watched a little TV and the fog is slowly lifting. I am at this very moment sitting upright in a chair, typing away on my laptop. And to think my high school guidance counselor said I would never amount to anything. In your face! I have amounted to something, my friend. A blogger with fresh material, that’s what.

I’m going to try not to be a complete dumb ass for a while. But stay tuned.

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