Sometime in mid-September, people stopped commenting on my blogs. I kept posting, but no one had anything to say. I was sad but figured hey, just keep moving, one foot in front of the other. No one loves me anymore. Sniffle, sniffle (side glance to see if anyone is watching so there’s someone to feel sorry for me).
What an odd phenomenon! I mean, absolutely everyone stopped commenting, all at the same time. Oh boy. This is why you should believe me when I tell you I’m a moron! Did it ever cross my mind that there was a technical issue and comments were being tossed out into cyberspace somewhere? No. As with everything else in life, in my mind it became all about me. My writing just isn’t as fresh anymore, there are a million blogs better than mine; I am losing readers left and right from sheer boredom. Not that I got carried away or anything. It’s not like I have such a fragile ego…nervous giggle. Still, I forged ahead, bravely blogging about nonsense like always. Nothing in particular to say.
So the other day, Dan casually mentioned that he backed up my blog but can’t get all the lost comments back. They are gone…possibly to float in darkness for all eternity. I said, huh? Dan explained that the spam plug-in, which I used to really love, stopped working mid-September, and just rejected all comments. Oh. Staggering. It wasn’t about me, it was simply a technical issue? The cruel winds of fate once again whispered in my ear, “you’re an idiot, and this is a mind-numbingly bad metaphor.”
Anyway, I’m not sure what any of you possible commenters saw when you hypothetically commented on my crystalline wit and stunning observations about the human condition. I can only guess that you said things like “brilliant” and “what a wit!” and “incredibly insightful!” and “whatchu talkin’ ‘bout Willis?” And all like that.
So, uh, never mind. And thanks for stopping by.