Will Work For Fashion

There are few things more stressful to a woman than figuring out what to wear every day.  I try to keep up a rotation for work so there are at least 8 business days before I repeat outfits, but sometimes that’s a stretch.  Men just don’t understand the thought that goes into it.

I step in my closet and see my favorite brown wool number.  The pants are kind of long so I have to wear 4” heels, but I just wore huge heels yesterday, and I need to give my poor feet a break.  OK, so what can I wear with shoes that have no more than 2” heels?  Of course!  The gray suit.  Oh shoot-the gray suit is kind of thin and it’s like 20 below outside, so no go.  No problem, I’ll just wear the gray dress.  Except…the only clean tights I have right now are brown.

OK, brown tights and brown dress?  Hmmm.  I love that dress why don’t I ever wear it?  I pull it on and immediately remember that it has this super itchy tag that will not cut cleanly.  Okey dokey, brown dress back on the hanger to wait until the next time I put it on and remember it’s too itchy.

Light bulb—the green suit!  Why am I being so silly when the obvious choice is right in front of me?  Except…it’s not right in front of me.  Where the &^%$#* is my green suit?  It takes me a couple minutes of panicking before I remember that it’s at the dry cleaners, which is currently closed.

The plaid skirt would be brilliant if I’d ever found a matching sweater.  Nope, I just have a sweater that seems like it would match until I actually put it with the skirt.  Bottom line, great skirt, nothing to wear with it.

I stare at the camel wool suit and try to remember if that’s what I actually wore just yesterday.  The day before that?  If I can’t remember when I last wore it, will anyone else?  Doubtful, but too risky.  A 2 day rotation is completely unacceptable.

Heavy sigh.  The cats are scratching on my closet door, what the hell do they know?  They never need a change of fur-they go from day to evening to next day to next evening, always looking smashing.  Dan is telling me I need to hustle up, and what exactly am I supposed to do?  Go to work in my pajamas?

OK, take a deep breath, remain calm.  And that’s when I spot it—the blue suit.  Warm enough?  Check.  Itchy tag?  No.  2” blue heels?  Absolutely.  Whew.  I pull on the suit and scramble downstairs.

That’s when Dan tells me I need to change because there’s a giant stain on my jacket.

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