Truth Revealed! Page 201

Not to beat a dead horse, but apparently some of you are still uncomfortable taking diet advice from someone such as me.  That’s OK.  But where will you turn?  Do you think the answers are buried in the pages of glossy magazines like Ladies Home Journal and Good Housekeeping?  Let’s flip through a typical issue.

P.8:  What Red Bull doesn’t want you to know about boosting your energy:  Sleep More, Work Less!

P. 15:  The REAL Al Roker:  Weatherman or Double Agent?

P. 31:  Science Review:  Can you really dig a hole to China?

P. 52:  Veterinary Anthropologists Agree:  Cats Rule, Dogs Drool

P. 112:  Knock, Knock:  Do we ever really know who’s there?

P. 156:  5 Diet Tips to Take You from Fat to Fabulous

Oh goody!  That’s the one we want.  Flipping to page 156…exactly 5 tips:

  1. Ditch those hair extensions!  Thick hair is weighing you down—thinner hair, thinner you!
  2. Easy does it…one foot on the scale, one foot on the floor
  3. It works for the celebrities why not you?  Pull out a rib or two!
  4. Switch from glasses to contact lenses-every ounce counts!
  5. Fat sucks:  new home liposuction kit

Happy now?  Those the brilliant ideas you’ve been hoping to discover?  Hmmph.  Time to walk away from that magazine my friend; they don’t care about you, because right there on page 182…

Quick and Easy Candy Kabobs!

Prep Time:  20 minutes

Eating Time:  5 minutes

Ingredients:

1 bag large marshmallows

1 bag peanut butter cups

1 bag Oreo minis

1 box truffles

1 bottle chocolate syrup

Alternate ingredients on long skewers.  Dip in chocolate syrup.  Eat and repeat.

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4 Responses to Truth Revealed! Page 201

  1. Bonnye says:

    What a wonderful way for you to start off the New Year. I just hung up from your Mom and said I hope Jill starts her blog again because you became our laugh of the day. I went on to Facebook and there you were. Happy to have you back and hope you continue on a regular basis. We all need a laugh. Maybe you should be writing comic routines. Love you Jill. Happy, healthy New Year to you and Dan.

  2. mimijk says:

    I was good with this until the article titles “Cats Rule, Dogs Drool”…um, really?? 🙂

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